Uncle Buck's Boobie Bungalow

Property weighs 7 sub-metrics — atmosphere, location, privacy, parking, luxury, amenities, capacity — each scored 0–10. They roll up into the single 0–100 property score.

Signals come from verified reviews, venue data, and website text. The overall dot on the radar is the average shape across these sub-metrics.

More like a rundown shack than a club.

The property is a disaster – cramped, dirty, and in a questionable area. The lack of amenities and poor parking options don't help. Unless you're into rough-around-the-edges dives, skip this one.

Service weighs 7 sub-metrics — door, bar, speed, respect, safety, clean, value — each scored 0–10. They roll up into the single 0–100 service score.

Signals come from verified reviews, venue data, and website text. The overall dot on the radar is the average shape across these sub-metrics.

You'll be ignored and overcharged.

The service is abysmal, with slow and unfriendly staff. Don't expect any respect or concern for your well-being. You'll be lucky to get a drink without a fight.

Food weighs 7 sub-metrics — quality, price, drinks, bottles, luxury, cigar, value — each scored 0–10. They roll up into the single 0–100 food score.

Signals come from verified reviews, venue data, and website text. The overall dot on the radar is the average shape across these sub-metrics.

Terrible food and drinks at outrageous prices.

The food is a joke, with overpriced and underwhelming dishes. The drinks are no better, with tiny pours and outrageous prices. Bring your wallet and your appetite for disappointment.

Performers weighs 6 sub-metrics — talent, style, interact, pro, vip, dance — each scored 0–10. They roll up into the single 0–100 performers score.

Signals come from verified reviews, venue data, and website text. The overall dot on the radar is the average shape across these sub-metrics.

No talent, no skills, no appeal.

The performers are a mix of unskilled and uninterested, with none of the charm or charisma you'd expect. The VIP experience is non-existent, and the dance value is nonexistent. Unless you're into watching people struggle, this isn't the place for you.

Each point on the radar is a dimension scored 0–100, weighted by how much it shapes a night out. Balanced shapes mean well-rounded clubs; spikes mean a venue excels at one thing but not others.

Tap any dimension's own info icon to see which sub-metrics feed into it.

A total bust from top to bottom.

Every aspect of this club is subpar. From the rundown property to the terrible service, it's clear the owners have given up. Unless you're desperate, avoid this place like the plague.

SW Score is a weighted composite across four dimensions — property, service, food, and performers — measured across 27 sub-metrics and a separate value score.

Sub-metric signals are pulled from verified reviews, venue data, and website text. Each dimension rolls up into a 0-100 score, which feeds the weighted overall.

How to read the shape: a balanced radar means a well-rounded club. A spiked shape means it excels at one thing and not others. Tap any dimension below for its full breakdown.